All you wanted was somebody who cares

So I'm feeling all sad and down and really missing my friends so I want to write them all a little note in this blog telling them why I'm glad they're my friend. I'm not feeling super sad and depressed or anything, I just miss them and it's always nice to be reminded of why you're important to someone, right? 

Hannah Joy Clark. I miss you more than elephants and bears and trucks and penguins. I miss Red Lexia and walks and working out together and talking about working out and not doing it. I miss Gilmore Girls and concrete mixers and Gossip Girl and pass the pint. I love you because I feel like we think and feel a lot of the same things about life even when we're apart and haven't seen each other in months. I love you because we can spend 10 minutes talking about mean swans and it's no big deal, because we can lie in bed all day long doing nothing and have more fun then if we'd gone out. I love that we make these grand plans for our life together and even if they fall through I know it's not because we're not as good of friends anymore, but because we've just changed our plan. I feel like you are completely supportive of me and my life and I know that I can always count on you to be my best friend. You’re the best daughter I could ever ask for!

Krystal Diane Smith. (I believe you told me once that that was your middle name) I am so thankful that I met you this year and am happy that we've become such good friends so quickly. You have been my savior and my escape for these past couple weeks and sometimes I don't know what I would have done without you. You've been there to listen to me bitch for 13 minutes straight, made me laugh about ridiculous things like an AC unit and showed me that you value my friendship by opening up your can of crazy on me. I’m completely comfortable with you and I really feel like I could talk to you about almost anything. I can't wait to come back and start all of our adventures (the zoo, ducks, the park, nick and nora and quarantine, sleeping with the ladybug) and have more pillow talk! I’ll continue to help you with your self project if you help me remember why I’m doing mine! You’re fantastic and my favorite best best friend/unhealthy obsession. :)

John Russell Stanger. Oh dear, I would be so lost without you! You and I have been through so much shit together and I’m so happy that we’ve managed to stay friends through all of these ups and downs. For a while I wasn’t sure if we were going to make it and I couldn’t be happier that we did. And I’m really glad that we had a rocky/interesting start because I think it just gives character to our friendship. I miss you so much. You and miss Hannah pants. I miss driving down the hunt road listening to Rilo Kiley, our one last all nighter that wasn’t as exciting as we had planned, the craziness from freshman year with Cova, the freeness and fun that came with my birthday, cooking with evoo, pretending to be your girlfriend so you didn’t feel stupid at the Kelly Clarkson concert, making out with you at parties and shocking the shit out of people… You are my absolute best friend and I really hope you know how much your friendship means to me. I think you’re the one person who knows everything about me. You’re the one person that I don’t hesitate to tell things to. Well, sometimes I hesitate, but you’re still the person I tell it all to because I know that you love me no matter what and I have never felt judged by you in the least.

Rebecca Ellen Bell. Oh dear, have we been through a lot together. Our friendship has been a quite a ride and I know that we haven’t always enjoyed it, but I glad we seem to have survived and I hope you are too. I’m really sad that I’m not going to be there to celebrate your birthday with you but know that I’m definitely thinking of you. And the shit ton of fun that we’ve had together. Those crazy camping trips, skipping class and going to the river, making special mac n cheese, hiding in showers together, me calling your nurse a bitch, playing Balderdash, watching you run into glass phone booths in France, stealing silverware from the air plane! When I think of you and our friendship I often think back to when I called you crying from Kerrville last summer and you were ready to jump in the car and drive two hours just to hug me and let me know that it was going to be ok. That’s the most amazing thing anyone’s offered to do for me, and I know you would have followed through with it if I’d let you. I miss you a hell of a lot more than I think you realize and I love you more than pie!

Elaine Francis Murray. I effing miss you! I am so glad that you and I got over the issues that we had with each other and are such good friends now. I was a bit worried when I first left this summer because I didn’t really know if you and I would keep in touch and stay friends and I’m very happy to discover that we have! You are wonderful and I cannot wait to come back and see you in October. We definitely need to go to IHOP and have some Chasi-Elaine time! I appreciate that I can call you up and bitch anytime I want and I know you’ll agree with me, even if both clearly know that I’m wrong! And I love that I can tell you when you’re being a bitch and be mad at you for being late to your own birthday and you know that you could always do the same to me, and it would be ok. Because we’re both just like that.

Alexandrea Marie Gantt. I saved the voicemail that you left me the other day so I could listen to it again because it was so good to hear your voice. Kinda creepy, right? It was also so I could remember that girls name and look her up. I miss you so damn much. I hate that I haven’t seen you since January and I hate that we never really get to talk. I love that our friendship always picks up right where it left off and I love that there’s never a dull moment with us! Cancun, “shebelike”, “he was like this, and I was like this!”, swimming with Jonny and Steven and me not knowing which one was which, all of the crazy boys that we’ve gone through over the years, Bowie and ACC, playing board games and going bowling, watching the Exorcist at Tess’, making t-shirts for English class with Hoss. You have no idea how much you coming to my graduation meant to me even if we didn’t get to spend any time together. I don’t ever want to not be friends with you. I love my Bozo and I must get to see you when I’m home!

Therese Marie Welch. Where do I begin with you, Tess? Even though we don’t talk often I take comfort in knowing that you’re there for me. You’ll probably never read this or even know that I wrote it, but you were my best friend for so long that it would just be wrong for me not to acknowledge you here. We have so many silly memories together (pan head, freezer freezer, bus or card, etc) and I always liked that you and I could sit and do nothing and just enjoy each others company. One of my favorite memories is when your dad went out of town and I came and stayed with you for a few days and we just lounged around the house watching movie and reading. When I think of our friendship, I thin of the word calm. I can’t remember us ever being mad at each other or ever fighting. I do remember getting a phone call from you and knowing exactly what was wrong even though I couldn’t understand a word you said because you were so hysterical. I also remember calling you when things were going down hill with Steven and I and you just let me sit and cry on the phone to you. You are like the sister I never had and I love you.